Featured : Kate Spade table decor
What does it mean to be a black socialite?
Mrs. Josephine Beall Willson Bruce
1st Black Socialite
Socialite : "a person who is well known in fashionable society and is fond of social activities and entertainment."
Now that we are aware of the definition, let us look at the characteristics and traits that can be associated with the word. If you sit back and ask yourself "Girl, are you fond of social activities and entertainment?", I'm sure your answer will be "yes girl, of course!" Then you have completed Step 1, identifying the socialite in you! BUT ladies.... what KIND of social activities and entertainment are you fond of? I like to look at the term Socialite and break it down to "light of social life" (lol) ? Which means that whatever social scene you choose, when you arrive you are the light of the event. The social events you bless your light with are extremely crucial, the kind of socialite you want to be is a direct reflection of the social setting in which you shine your light! Choose wisely!
Step 2 Ladies ....... and this is vital! Every socialite MUST have these three characteristics; Charm, Confidence, Loyalty and Grace. By being charming and enchanting, you have to draw them in. You can bring a horse to water but you cannot make him drink it! Your mere presence in a social setting shows people you are ready and willing to interact, but if they do not want to interact with you your time in this game will end! Charm will keep others intrigued with your presence and it will leave them wanting more (aka they will be excited to see you at the next social outing). I am speaking from experience, once people start seeing you out whether or not you speak the first time is up to God, but whether or not they speak to you the second sighting is up to your charm! When I say confidence I mean strong and meaningful eye contact! Staring into someone's eyes meaninglessly will not only get you weird looks, but people will not want to interact with you once again ... congrats, you just lost your charm.
Always remember, people can smell fear! So all those spritz of COCO Mademoiselle you sprayed before you stepped out will be sprayed in vain if all they can smell on you is your discomfort! BUT, with genuine and meaningful confidence you can make amazing eye contact and own the souls of those you interact with ... just kidding... no but really though. To me confidence also requires some form of intelligence. I'm not telling you to be "fake" I’m telling you to be multi-dimensional. As you go through the room (or stand by the wall), you must remember that each interaction is unique because each person is unique. There is nothing and no one person more annoying than an un-genuine, crowd hopping, dip and dabbing, socialite who gives everyone they meet the same shpeal! Show the world all the different sides of who you are and make sure that each interaction matches the vibrations that are being given off by the other person. For example, as you make your way through the room keep your comments conservative, capitalistic, and above a certain IQ level when conversing with the "bougie girls", keep your comments fun, flirty, yet mysterious around the "frats" and laugh at all their jokes so you can feed their ego and make them think that somehow your presence is an asset to them. After that display of charm and confidence (multi-dimensionalism) you would have conquered two social groups who will be delighted to see you again the next time you see them!
Last but certainly NOT least, Grace. This is huge for me. Everywhere I go I try to exude grace in my walk, in my appearance, and in my speech. You can be loud and still be graceful, you can be all over the room and still be graceful, but the natural moderation that discerns your actions is what will make everything you do acceptable and likeable. There is an ora about grace that is so enchanting it will have people "whispering while staring" as you walk by. Grace is natural elegance, your nonchalant poise is the icing on the cake as you walk away from an interaction that you just nailed. I like to think of grace as providing the individual with a sense of mystery as well. "Who is she?" "Look at her, why have I not seen her before?" and most importantly, "When will I see her next?"
Step 3 : You must know where you've come from to know where you are going. As I began to hone the social light within me I could not help but wonder about black socialites of the past (here is where my nosiness kicked in), and being that I am an African-American history nerd I began to pay close attention to and look deeper into the social aspect of everyday life for African-American women of the past. Come to find out none of this was new! I learned of all the wonderful social organizations created back in the day and all the contributions these women made towards society (there goes that multi-dimensionalism I was speaking of earlier) Without proper research and education, further movement forward is like driving to a destination you have never before without proper directions... you're going somewhere but not necessarily where you are supposed to be going. The black socialite was born the minute we were set free, and ever since then we have dominated social scenes while dominating the classrooms and dominating the business and political world any and every way that we could! The black socialite revolutionized and redefined the term "Socialite" and the history of it all is nothing short of remarkable.....well, find out for yourself!
Shop like a Socialite-Belle
So long Summer...
Even with temperatures still sky high, its time to face the sad truth, summer has come to a close. But, I know I'm not the only one who isn't prepared to cycle out my summer wardrobe JUST yet. Here are a few ways to rock ur summer favorites even after the equinox.
With satin pieces popping up on the runway featured in the FW17 lines of Gucci, Bottega Venetta, Acne Studios, and the like, there is definitely room for satin in our fall wadrobe. This easy summer staple is one piece that without a doubt can make the transitions from sundress to your go to autumnal 'fit.'
a love is blind
Pair 'em with jeans
Let's face it , fall is practically THE layering season. So, instead of retiring your slip dress for fear of cold legs, throw a pair of jeans underneath. Pairing a satin dress with blue jeans, will give you a fun and funky street style look.
If I could shop for shoes all day...
Durban, South Africa
Boca Raton, Florida
South Beach, Miami, Florida
My wonderful, quiet, but lowkey lit summer . . .
When a belle eats!
"A modern day southern belle is vegetarian"
- Tips and tricks to totally conquer vegan/vegetarian living (coming 8/21)
Bringing you awesome photos of volunteer work I have done here in Daytona Beach 8/21! Be sure to keep up
"A better community starts with one"